We all need our personal space. Just because you're living together or married doesn't mean you have to do everything together either. It's healthy and important for you both to maintain your individual uniqueness while moving towards your mutual goals. Here are three ways you can create your own personal space within marriage:
1) Physical Space - Whether it's a separate room, corner, or shelf, each of you would benefit from having your own personal physical space for some of your more meaningful possessions. Decide together where your special spots will be and what it will be used for. This shows respect, interest, and support for both of your needs.
2) Emotional Space - You and your partner may have different hobbies or interests. Going out and participating in the things you enjoy, even if it's not together, is a big part of maintaining your individuality. So if you play tennis and he plays music, support each other. See if you can schedule your hobbies around the same time, so you're both doing something enjoyable and neither of you feels left out.
3) Mental Space - We all need to clear our minds at some point or other. That means we don't always want to be around others, spouse included. It's perfectly natural to want private time and sometimes it's hard to find when you live with someone else. Discover new or easy ways to create moments where you can recharge yourself mentally and spiritually. You can choose a time when you know your partner won't be at home, take a quiet bath, or practice meditation. Let your spouse know how you plan on getting your mental space so that he understands what you're up to and doesn't interrupt the peace and calm you hope to achieve. Encourage each other to take a break from it all. Not only will it help you unwind, it will help you think and focus better in the long run.
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