Why Most New Year's Resolutions Fail

f you're one of the many people skeptically writing up your New Year's resolutions for 2015, this post is for you. Sure, you may have had resolutions before, maybe for more years then you can count, but they never seem to stick. What gives? Why haven't you succeeded in fulfilling your goals?

You can and you will succeed if you understand why most resolutions fail. Aside from setting realistic goals, here are the top reasons you may be coming up short when it comes to achieving success:

Your Resolution is Not Specific Enough: This is a big one. Whether you're creating wedding day goals or everyday ones, you MUST be specific. It isn't good enough to say, "I want to lose weight." How much do you want to weigh? How are you going to do it? Who's going to help you or where will your weight loss program take place? It's okay if your resolution is more than one sentence long, in fact, it's better. The more details you incorporate, the more likely you are to succeed, because you're backing it up with a plan.

Your Resolution is Not Measurable: Sometimes we like to include feel good resolutions like, "I want to be a better person" or "I want to be a confident bride." Unless you can define what either of those mean and figure out a way to measure it, you're setting yourself up for failure. That's not to say you shouldn't aim for these things, you may just have to tweak it. If being confident means standing up for your wedding hopes and dreams, you can make it measurable by rephrasing it as, "I will be able to express my wedding day vision whenever challenged to change my decisions." While you can make this statement more specific, it's now measurable in that you can tally up the times you are able to confidently express yourself.

Your Resolution is Not Time Bound: Open-ended resolutions are about as successful as no resolutions at all. You can't hold yourself accountable for your actions if you don't have a time-frame. This is critical. Having a date to complete your resolution by creates a sense of urgency to get it done. If there's no deadline, you'll find plenty of excuses for not getting it done. Be your own boss and give yourself a project due date. It's the only way to have a successful goal.   

Three Things Every Groom Can Be Thankful For This Holiday Season

Josh Womack of Laughstaff is back with some more humor and advice for the groom in this guest post. So all you grooms out there, sit back, relax, and enjoy this post written with you in mind.

In most weddings the groom is unfortunately an afterthought to the bride....well not only the bride, but the reception venue, church, deejay, dessert, etc. Yes it's true, the groom is technically there but the day belongs to the woman in white. A groom is like the single mother of the wedding. He does a lot of things behind the scenes that will never get the glamour or attention of his bride's dress. 

If you know a groom-to-be in 2015, pat him on the back and remind him of these little takeaways that EVERY groom can be grateful for. 

1) You're Not the Bride, Hallelujah! - Leading up to the wedding the bride can endure a lot of stress. The centerpieces have to be perfect, the bridesmaid’s dresses have to be a favorable color AND the bride herself has to show off her best self in the dress (ask some previous brides about the time and dollars that went into a personal trainer or eight-week tanning package, these things add up). 

I love being a guy. As we age and the crow's feet form, we become ‘distinguished’ and as the grey hairs pop up it just reflects wisdom and life experience. Women are held to a standard of beauty that the media almost makes unattainable. Be supportive to your bride-to-be, but be grateful you don't have to wake up at 5:00 a.m. to start working on your hair (and if you are bald, double bonus). 

2) The Bachelor Party - I'm not talking about some Vegas debauchery or a story that ends with "Brad ended up getting the midget stripper's number." The chance to get together with the bros for some golf or even a nice dinner should be cherished. As we get older, the chance to 'get the band back together' becomes less and less frequent to due obligations of family, parenting, job, etc. 

The bachelor party might be the last time all of your current and childhood friends get together so live in the moment and soak up the old stories & open-mouth smiles. The next time you all get together one of the guys will be missing, probably because you’re at his funeral. It’s the truth! Don’t shoot the messenger. 

3) No More Dating – Let’s be honest, it’s a self-obsessive jungle out there. Between selfies, Tinder, Instagram and the usual run-around that comes with finding the one, there’s a certain calmness knowing that part of your life is in the past. I know the thrill of the chase and the first kiss is always exciting, but the games people play aren’t. Why hasn’t she texted back? Is it a bad sign we hooked up after our first date (answer is usually yes)? Was she not a fan of Jason Aldean? I knew I should have taken her to see Hootie (Darius Rucker to the intellectual)! 

So chin up future groom, the future is bright. Embrace the new chapter and smile on the past, but gear up for what lies ahead. 

Josh Womack lives in Cleveland, OH and is the founder of Laughstaff, a speech-writing company that uses stand-up comedians as consultants to best men and matrons of honor around the world. Laughstaff has written over 140 speeches and will help you deliver a wedding toast that is heartfelt, hilarious and memorable. Follow them on Twitter @Laughstaff and check them out at www.laughstaff.com.

Bridal Body Image

Today I have the pleasure of sharing this wonderful guest post by Teresa Foss-Del Rosso, image consultant and owner of DC Elite Image. She offers great advice and tips on loving the skin you're in!

So you met the man of your dreams, got the perfect ring, and set the big date! Now comes one of the most important decisions you will make regarding your wedding planning, selecting your dress! Suddenly all kinds of thoughts flood your mind…what styles are best for your body type, why did you eat that pint of chocolate gelato last night, why didn’t you start taking those Barre classes six months ago. This is going to be one of the best days of your life, so you want to look and feel your best but those few extra pounds you’ve been wanting to lose are front and center. Positive Body Image is something every woman struggles with, especially on her wedding day. Here are some tips to keep you grounded and focus on learning to love your natural body shape! 

First And Foremost, Remember HE LOVES YOU JUST AS YOU ARE!  He wants to spend the rest of his life with you, whether you lose those ten pounds before the wedding or not. In his eyes, you are the most beautiful woman in the world already. Don’t do anything drastic. 

Embrace Your Beautiful Self

                                                                                                                                                                           Celebrate your natural body shape and know that your physical appearance is just one side of you. It doesn’t reflect your character, value as a person, or how loved you are. And you are loved! 

Learn The Styles Best For Your Body Type

                                                                                                                                                          

If you are unsure of your body type, consult an image consultant or wardrobe stylist to help you figure out what styles are most flattering for your height, weight, skin tone and natural shape.

Strive To Be The Best You                                                                                                                                                                                           Not Beyonce, Giselle, or Chrissy Teigen. Set realistic goals for yourself and be confident in your own skin. Instead of focusing on the parts of your body you don’t like, focus on your favorite attributes and accentuate them. If you have great legs, think about doing a modern bride look with a short hemline or a front slit to show them off. If you have a buxom bosom, show off your curves with a feminine sweetheart neckline. Do you have wide hips but a small waistline? Try a princess-style gown that will show off what you love and conceal what you don’t. 

Do Not Try Any Crazy Crash Diets Or Workout Routines                                                                                                                                         Stick to the basics. Eat healthy, stay away from processed foods and too much alcohol, drink lots of water, and do some type of physical activity for at least 30 minutes 3-4 times a week. 

Create An Inspiration Board                                                                                                                                                                                     Look through bridal magazines and design an Inspiration board or make a Pinterest board with your findings to keep yourself organized. Show your wedding planner, stylist, and friends and plan a shopping trip with these ideas in mind. Stay positive and open-minded when trying on different styles to see what looks and feels best. 

Love Yourself                                                                                                                                                                                                       Everyone has had days when they don’t like parts of their body or the way they look. Remember to truly find your own style and have positive body image, you need to embrace, accept, and respect your natural body shape, skin tone, and other attributes that make you the beautiful unique woman you are. 

Teresa Foss-Del Rosso is the owner of DC Elite Image, a boutique image consulting company specializing in helping professional men and women look and feel their best in preparation for weddings, galas, and other special life events. Teresa has been in the fashion and beauty industry for over 15 years and has her BA in Fashion Merchandising from Marymount University. Some of Teresa’s work experience includes being a MAC-trained Makeup Artist, Stylist, Freelance Writer, Dating Coach, and Model. Find out more at www.dceliteimage.com and on Twitter @dceliteimage or FB at www.facebook.com/DCEliteimage

Time Saving Holiday Shopping Tips for the Busy Bride

Shoes? Check. Invitations? Check. Bridal Shower? Check. Holiday shopping? Uh oh. If you're worried about the time crunch between now and the holidays or the thought of gift shopping in the midst of wedding planning is overwhelming, try these ideas.

Gift Cards: Okay. Not original or the most fun gift to give, but if you're really cutting it down to the wire and feeling stressed out, it's the best way to go. You can purchase them from the convenience of home while you're in your PJs if you have to. And there's practically a gift card for every need, so you won't find yourself frustrated at not finding the perfect gift for your best friend or your grandfather. If you usually give wrapped gifts, add a note letting people know that due to your busy wedding planning schedule, this year you'll be handing out gift cards but that you look forward to returning to your usual routine after the wedding.

Shop at One Location: Part of the hassle of gift buying is that different people like different things. That usually means having to frequent various stores to get something for everyone. Before you know it, an entire day has come and gone just traveling around from one place to the next. Do yourself a favor this year and pick one store that sells stuff for anyone, regardless of age or gender. Whether you decide on a bookstore, cooking store, or outdoor sporting goods center, get all your gifts at that once place. You can even let people know you'll have a theme this year. It'll definitely save you travel time and you can still come up with some creative gifts for everyone on your list.

Bake or Make Something Tasty: Everyone loves food. If you happen to be a talented chef or baker, this will be easy for you. Spend a couple hours baking cookies, brownies, or whatever else is easy to make in bulk. Or maybe you prefer preserving fruits or making chocolate. If you enjoy doing something, it won't feel like work to you. Outside of making the goodies, you will have to buy containers to deliver your treats in. But this truly is a gift of love for those you love.

Throw a Party: Feeling too busy or too tired to do any shopping or work? Invite those on your guest list out instead. Treat them to dinner, a game of bowling, or even a movie night. Aside from making the reservations and sending out a quick invite letting people know this treat will be in lieu of a wrapped gift this year, there's not much else you have to do. Show up, have fun, and pay for the bill. A night out gives you some down time without the wrapping paper or clean up.

The Secret to Stopping an Argument with your Fiance (or anyone else) Before it Starts

Picture this: You come home after a long day of work and wedding related appointments, only to find your fiancé sulking over some leftover takeout. When you ask what's wrong, he begins telling you how you're always coming home late, you never go out anymore, and how this whole wedding thing is taking up all your time. What? Did you just hear him right? Here you are planning every detail of what's to be the most important day in your lives and he's complaining! You're doing the best you can to get every detail taken care of in between work and laundry. Maybe if he were to help a little more, you would have more time. You can see where this is going and how an argument can ensue.

Whatever the case or subject matter, however, there is a secret tool you can use to help diffuse arguments before they start. It takes practice and a cool head on your part, but it works. In psychology it's called the disarming technique. With it, you "disarm" your opponent by finding some truth in what they are saying. That's the hardest part, but generally you can find one point no matter how small, to agree with. In the case above, you might respond with, "You're right. Planning this wedding is taking up a lot of my time and we haven't been going out together as much." This response will shut down the argument factor, because you are essentially agreeing with your partner.

Next, try and put yourself in his shoes. "You must think I've totally forgot about our relationship and what this wedding is about in the first place?" Empathizing with your partner shows you are trying to understand where he is coming from. It also opens it up for a good, honest communication about how he's feeling. Addressing and validating your fiancé's feelings is critical in your relationship. After listening to him, share your feelings too. Saying something like, "I wish I didn't have to spend so much time away from you either. Maybe we can brainstorm some ways to relieve some of the things I have to get done or come up with a date night schedule?"

You can see how this entire example is responsive rather than reactive. That's what your aiming for in all relationships. The disarming technique will work with family members, friends, and wedding professionals too. And while it sounds simple on paper, it's actually quite hard to put into practice when you're in the heat of the moment. But it's not impossible if you practice and keep using it. It's an excellent secret weapon to stopping arguments before they start.

3 Things You're Doing that Adds MORE Stress to Your Life During the Holidays

'Tis the season. With December underway, it's crunch time to get your greeting cards out, shopping done, and baking in the oven. Lest you forget, you're engaged too and there's no real break when it comes to wedding planning. How do you juggle it all? Start by taking a look at these three things that could be causing additional stress during the holiday season.

1) Taking on Too Much: If you're already feeling overwhelmed with wedding  planning and the thought of the upcoming holiday is giving you anything but joy, maybe you have too much on your plate. Don't volunteer to host a holiday dinner party or cook if you don't have the time or energy. Decline invitations to parties if you're feeling like you're spread too thin. Or skip the holiday shopping if it's stressing you out. Tell everybody, that you'll get around to gifts after your wedding if you have to. The important thing is knowing when you're doing too much and setting limits.

2) Not Asking for Help: If you have a lot on your plate and are finding it difficult to get everything done, it may be time to call on some backup. Enlist the help of others when it comes to holiday preparations. Ask your fiancé to help with your greeting cards or spend an evening with your girlfriends getting the house decorated. In addition to offering support and helping you stay motivated, you'll feel less overwhelmed and have more fun when your work is a team effort.

3) Not Taking a Break: Planning your wedding is a big deal. It's probably the biggest event in your life. Even so, remember that your life can't revolve around planning a wedding. It has to be the other way around. That said, it's important that you take the time to enjoy the holidays. Everybody needs a breather and this is the perfect time to pick several days off from wedding stuff. However you choose to celebrate, do it fully without wedding worries getting in the way. It will help you enjoy the season more and hopefully recharge your "bridal batteries."