Farewell

It is with mixed emotions that I write what will likely be my final Bridal Balance blog post. Over the past several years, I  enjoyed being a part of the wedding industry, making new friends, networking, helping brides and their families while they plan their weddings. And while a part of me will always belong to the industry and keep an ear open to wedding news, I feel I have come to a point in my life where I need a make a change.

I have other interests and activities I would like to pursue, like hopefully publishing a piece of fiction one day. As I decide where my new passions lie and how they will manifest (and take care of my kiddos, of course), I simply won't have time to dedicate to Bridal Balance. I plan on archiving this blog on Blogger, so you can refer back to it at any time. I'll also maintain my Twitter and Facebook accounts to stay in the loop! And I'll update this post if I start up another blog in case you'd like to follow along my new adventure. 

It's been fun and I thank each of you for reaching out to me, teaching me, and reading along. I hope to stay in touch with many of you and will definitely keep up with your happenings. For now, I am signing off  and wishing you all peace, balance, and happiness!

~Michal  

Top 3 Reasons to Take Breaks from Wedding Planning

If you're a spring or summer bride this year, you may find yourself handling all the final details of your wedding day. After all, spring is only a few weeks away! While it's important to be on top of things, it's also beneficial to take breaks while planning your wedding. Here's three good reasons to take a breather if you find you're consumed with wedding planning lately:

1) Reduces Your Stress- You may think that taking a break would increase your stress because it means less time for you to get things done. In actuality, time away from planning your wedding can help you re-energize yourself so you don't get bogged down with all the details of your upcoming nuptials. Much like other areas of your life, like work or school, it's healthy to take 'vacations' so the stress doesn't get to you. 

2) Refreshes Your Perspective- Too much wedding planning can cloud your thoughts. If you're finding yourself unsure about certain decisions, taking some time off can help put things into perspective. It will keep you from getting that "deer in the headlight" look and clear your mind from unnecessary clutter. Often when we step aside from a project, it gives our brain a chance to settle. Suddenly, the right decision or idea pops into our head. 

3) It's Supposed to be Fun- You usually get one shot at planning your wedding, so you want it to be fun. Trying on dresses, tasting cake, and looking through invitations is supposed to be exciting. But if it's something you're doing day in and day out, it becomes rote and uninteresting. By choosing a few days or set hours a week to focus on your wedding, you give yourself something to look forward to instead of dread. Create natural breaks in your week to spend on other things in your life and planning your wedding will feel less like a job and more like a once in a lifetime experience.

The Uncluttered Bride

My husband and I went on a cleaning spree this weekend. It all started when he brought home the book, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo. I read the book and thought it would be interesting to try out some of her suggestions (check out the author's ideas on how to arrange your clothes drawers). One change led to another and before we knew it, we unloaded three bags of clothing, two bags of toys, a number of larger baby items we aren't currently using, and enough trash to fill up our large garbage bin. In just two days, our lives became more clutter-free.

To be clear, we didn't live in a messy house. I've always prided myself on being neat. But after marriage, moving into a house, and two kids we accumulated a lot of stuff! The stuff would go in the closets or the drawers. There were neat piles of papers in various corners and plenty of toys out in the open for our young children to play with. And while we couldn't pinpoint it at the time, my husband and I were feeling stuck, distracted. Once we cleared out most of our access stuff, we immediately felt a weight lift off our shoulders. We woke up feeling energized and invigorated. We realized that the clutter in our home created clutter in our minds and how much easier it is to think, act, and live in an environment free of stuff we didn't need.

One of the greatest assets you'll find while planning your wedding is being organized. So it's a good goal to begin de-cluttering the stuff around you now.  Look around your living space. Is it a bit messy? Have you misplaced any documents or other items recently? Are there piles of papers on you desk or table? Do you own clothes or other items you haven't used in years? If you answered 'yes' to any of these questions, start tidying up today.

Your wedding is before you and one way to make the planning less stressful is by transforming your home into a relaxing environment. That means cleaning out or giving away everything you don't use and going through your paperwork and eliminating the need to 'get to it later.' Not only will this create more space physically, it will help clear your mind mentally. With this transformation, you can jump headfirst into planning your wedding. You'll be better equipped to organize your wedding materials and stay focused on the task at hand, without becoming distracted by the stuff around you. An uncluttered bride is more apt to get her to-do list done without all the stress. It also sets a great precedent,  as you'll lay the foundation for a clutter-free life together. 

  

5 Things I learned about Marriage from My Grandmother

Last week my grandmother died. I was very close to her, so this is a bittersweet blog dedicated to her. It's bitter because, of course, I miss her terribly. But it's sweet, because I feel blessed to have spent so much time with her growing up. My grandmother taught me a great deal in life. She was married for over 50 years and in that time, I learned a lot about what it takes to have a great marriage, like they did. Whether you're planning your wedding, a newlywed, or already married for some time, here are some great tips for a long and happy marriage: 

1) Humor- More important than anything else, my grandmother always stressed how important it is to laugh in marriage. It helps when you have a partner who makes you laugh, but laughter itself can help lighten the mood in a household when things get tough. I know they had challenges and difficult moments throughout their lives, but somehow they were able to find something humorous about a situation or at least make each other smile. And the smiles and laughter definitely kept their relationship going.

2) Let Little Things Slide- My grandparents worked very hard. They owned a small store, where the two of them worked tirelessly and came home to more work. In all of those years, I never heard my grandmother get upset at my grandfather for doing or not doing something. If he left his coffee cup out, she would wash it and put it away. She never let little things or his quirky habits bother her. It was part of the marriage package and not worth getting upset over in the long run.  

3) Faith- My grandmother had lots of faith. She prayed every day for her family and those around her who needed prayers. She took things she couldn't control, like finances, and sent those worries up to Heaven. She would always say, "you just have to believe, have faith." She felt strongly that G-d would take care of the things she couldn't. That belief kept her worrying to a minimum, which in turn strengthened her marriage.  

4) Compliment- My grandmother knew how important it was to show her love and affection to my grandfather. She would compliment him when she had the chance, even if it was something little. "I like that sweater on you" or "the chicken you cooked is delicious," she would say. And he would reciprocate too. Pointing out those little details in marriage is important for both sides to know they are loved and appreciated.  

5) Space- Both of my grandparents had their roles at home and even so, my grandmother would give my grandfather his space to do things he enjoyed, like gardening, reading, and listening to his music. She allowed him time and space without pressure to get stuff done at home. Each of them having the space to do the things they enjoyed helped them come together to get things done in the end. My grandfather would clean the house weekly, while my grandmother cooked and baked. He would took care of the garbage, she did the laundry. He did the business bills, she payed the household ones. Their work was very equal, as was their down time. I never heard them talk about it, but somehow there was this magic about their partnership. They lived and worked happily side by side each and every day. 

If you're not doing so already and want to better your relationship, try implementing one of these things. If you want to dramatically improve your marriage, try doing all of them. It's hard and we all forget to at times, but I feel like they are little magical relationship tools. Try whipping one of these things out before a disagreement is about to start. Offer a compliment instead or tell your partner to take some time to do XYZ that he enjoys. See what happens and let me know! 

Powerball & Your Relationship: How They're Connected

Tonight the Powerball drawing is a record $1.5 billion. I don't usually play the lottery and I know the odds are less then favorable, but I bought a ticket anyway. I bought the ticket because, like most of us, I like to dream. What would I do if I won a ton of money?

I started telling my husband my lottery winning ideas: the house upgrades I'd like to make, that Honeymoon we never took, a dog for our daughter. He told me we didn't need so much money and that he'd give most of it away. Certainly I understand giving a bunch away, but couldn't we fantasize about the fun things we could do with it first? That's when he said some magic words: "We haven't even won the lottery and it's tearing us apart already."

Now, he said that in a funny, humorous way. We were joking about it all and it wasn't really tearing us apart, but it got me to thinking. Big decisions, like what to do with a billion dollars, need to be approached as a couple. It's a great way to check in with each other and make sure you're on the same page. It's true that neither I nor anyone reading this will probably win the lottery, but dreaming about it together can be a relationship builder.

After our initial conversation about our winnings, my husband and I sat down and had a more serious look at what we would do if we didn't have to worry about money. The first thing we both agreed on was to set aside a huge portion for charitable purposes. There are plenty of worthy organizations out there and it forced us to talk about causes important to each of us. We also think it would be fun to play "angel donors" and go to crowdfunding sources and anonymously help the many individuals and families in need.

The next thing we want to do is use it as a teachable moment for our children. Granted they are quite young, but they understand that it costs money to buy things and they can't get everything they want. That said, we know animals are very important to our 4 year old daughter, who very badly wants to adopt a doggie. We don't have the funds for a pet at the moment, but if we did we could show her how donating money can help nurture and save the lives of many animals. Of course, we'd get her a dog or two as well.

Then we talked about work and what we'd really like to do if money wasn't an issue. My husband would pursue his passion for music and further his music non profit and I would focus on my writing, publish, maybe launch a new magazine or website. It made us fully aware that these are goals we can aspire to with or without a billion dollars. 

Talking about winning the lottery helped us learn more about ourselves, our relationship, and what's most important to us. If you haven't done so yet, I encourage you and your partner to sit down and discuss what you would seriously do if you won the lottery. You can even relate it to your wedding planning. If money wasn't an issue, how would your wedding look? What would you do differently? Are you both on the same page? Continue the conversation from there. What did you learn? I'd love to know. 

New Year, New You: Create a Resolution You're Passionate About

Now that 2016 has arrived, I'm sure you already have or are planning on setting up some New Year resolutions. And there are plenty articles out there about creating resolutions and  how to keep them. I've even blogged about it before. But in this post, I want to focus on something else: Passion.

That's right. Instead of thinking about common goals, like losing weight or getting organized, ask yourself what you are passionate about in life. Take a few minutes to reflect on what's most important to you, what you love to do or what you've always wanted to do. Is family your #1 priority, but it's been a little neglected while planning your wedding? Are you passionate about painting? Have you always wanted to learn to dance, but never seemed to find the time? Discover what drives you and make that your resolution for the New Year. It's a great way to kick off the year because if you want something badly enough, you'll be more inclined to go out and get it.

Don't let excuses get in the way either. Sure, you're busy, money is tight, or you might get to it later, but think of how much better you'll feel once you start doing what you love to do. It will make you feel good, which will make you happier and more satisfied in other areas of your life. Plus, you don't have to fulfill these dreams all at once. If you love your family, but lack time to spend with them, pick an hour each week to go out with a different family member. Think of how important they'll feel with the 1:1 time and how good you'll feel keeping the connection going. If you want to paint or dance, but can't afford lessons, watch a video and learn on your own. Grab your partner and learn together or just paint or dance for the fun of it. Make it a habit and have a little fun every night, even if it's for 5 minutes. 

The point is: our New Year's resolutions are often boring, rote,  and typical. Half the time, that's why we never accomplish them. Change the way you live, by changing those resolutions to something that is truly important to you. So, what are you passionate about? I'd love to hear how 2016 will be your best year yet!    

Let Your Light Shine: Internal Self-Care for Brides

Today we have a wonderful guest post from Rebekah Holbrook, registered Yoga Teacher in Richmond, VA. She offers some great tips for staying balanced while planning your wedding.

Finding the perfect dress and hiring professionals to do your hair and makeup will help you look radiant on your wedding day. But what about your inner light? How will you make sure that is shining? Don’t let planning a wedding leave you feeling burned out. Keep glowing with these tips for staying relaxed leading up to the big day.

1. Breathe. racticing an even, steady, breath calms the nervous system, signaling to your body and your brain that you can relax. et a timer on your phone to alert you several times per day. When the alarm sounds, stop what you are doing, find a comfortable sitting or standing position, close your eyes, and breath deeply in and out of your nose for one minute. You’ll feel calmer immediately.

2. Get quiet. ngagement parties, bachelorette weekends, and daily communication with vendors can leave even the most extroverted bride feeling depleted. Make some time each week to engage in a quiet activity such as yoga, prayer, or meditation. Use this time to tune out the chatter, and tune into you.

3. Listen to your body. f done mindfully, orking out more consistently before the wedding day can help you feel healthier, sexier, and happier. The key is to listen to what your body needs, so you don’t over-do it. If you feel a cold coming on, skip the early morning barre class for an extra hour of sleep. Have a minor injury? Follow the RICE method (Rest, Ice, Compress, Elevate). Play it safe leading up to the big day, and your body will thank you!

4. Acknowledge how you feel. etting married is a major milestone. During any time of transition, it is normal to feel uncertain or scared. But anxiety about the wedding may have more to do with past experiences than your present relationship. Recognize your feelings, through journaling, talk therapy, or conversations with people you trust. Acknowledging your past can help you move more gracefully into the future.

5. Practice gratitude. eople who consistently practice gratitude have stronger immune systems and more positive emotions. During the wedding planning process, keep a gratitude journal, writing down one thing each day for which you are thankful. Not only will it make you feel better now, it will be a beautiful memento from this special time in your life that you can reflect on for years to come.

Rebekah Holbrook, Registered Yoga Teacher, teaches onsite yoga classes for brides and bridal parties through Ceremony Yoga. Ceremony Yoga classes are accessible to all levels and help brides stay calm and connected during the planning process and on the big day. To learn more, please visit ceremonyyoga.com.

More Than Just a Wedding

Sure, you're planning what might be the biggest event of your life. And, of course, you want it to be perfect. But, have you considered how you plan to live after your "I do's?" No, I'm not talking about the specs of your new house or who's doing the laundry. I'm referring to your way of living. 

How you want to live includes lifestyle decisions, like healthy eating, meditation, date nights, or living within a budget. If you've talked about these things with each other you're on the right track. But the best way to start off on the right foot is to start now. You don't have to wait until you're married to live the lifestyle you want together. In fact, the more practice you have ahead of time, the better place you'll be in once the honeymoon is over. So if you're committed to eating healthier or exercising more, begin now. Do it jointly, so you know you're on the right page. If money is an issue, don't let it become a burden in your relationship. Don't start your marriage off in a deficit. Live now, the way you want to live after the wedding. If that means cutting the guest list or changing venues, to stay in your wedding budget , then do it. You're setting a precedent for your future life together. Make it a point to have date nights, while planning your wedding. If you do, it's more likely you'll continue the tradition after the celebration is over. Date nights are a great way to stay focused on each other and learn and grow more together. 

A lot of couples will say, "I don't have time now" or "we plan on making those changes once things settle down." I'll let you in on a little secret: You won't have time later either and things will never settle down. Life is constantly in motion and there might never feel like enough time to finally sit down and say, "okay, let's start doing this." If it's not wedding planning, it's relocating, having a baby, or starting a new job. The most ideal time is now because you never know what tomorrow will bring or what lies ahead. Make planning your wedding more than just about one day; make it about planning your life.

Limousine Options: Which One is Right For Your Wedding Day?

Today's post is from Echo Limousine. They are the best-rated limo service company in Chicago, providing reliable and dependable car service with a wide range of customized packages suited to any needs and events.

Imagine it's your wedding day. Thinking about the entrance you want to make your wedding ceremony. How do you visualize it? Are you dropping from the sky in a hot-air balloon? Rolling by on a parade float? Or panting up to the door in your most comfortable sneakers after an invigorating run? These days, very little is off limits as far as wedding transportation goes.

One of the classic choices is the ever popular limousine. If this is what you are considering, choosing the right limousine to definitely has it' perks:

• You can seat ten or more people comfortably.
• You are able to watch TV.
• Serve yourself from the bar, and
• Have a chauffeur at your beck and call.

A big shiny limo is also impressive enough to instill awe in the occupants of those boring regular cars sitting in right next to your limo in traffic. There are lots of options available to you choose from so make sure to look at the variety of limos and ask some questions:

• What limo types and sizes are available?
• How many people can comfortably fit into each type and size?

You can seat anywhere from seven to twenty people in limos depending on the type of limo you reserve. Let's talk about the types.  

Types of Limos

Limos vary in size, amenities, luxuries, style and color, although most are black and white. Five main types of limos exist. Each is unique and serves its own unique purpose.

1. Stretch-Hummer Limos:

If you would like to ride with your entire wedding party, consider riding in style in a trendy Stretch-Hummer limo. It's luxurious with additional amenities:

• Flat screen TV,
• Disco balls,
• Bar areas,
• Glasses,
• Tinted windows and much more.

Hummers have a rugged and very distinguishing exterior. They are a far cry from the classic limo look. While it's expensive, Stretch-Hummer limo is still very popular option for your weddings.

2. The Chauffeured Limo, Lincoln Town Car

For those who want to mix adventure with luxury, arranging a Lincoln Town Car for wedding would certainly be a memorable experience. A town car is a smaller chauffeur-driven option. It has a larger frame with a rear spacious passenger compartment, offering a substantial amount of foot room. This larger area gives you a more comfortable ride. Town cars generally accommodate two to three passengers but may just be the perfect way to get you and the groom to and from the festivities, at a lesser cost. This vehicle is unpretentious, earthy, and natural.

4. Extra-length, Custom-Coachwork Luxury Stretch Limousines

The current trend with wedding cars is very much the Stretch Limo. It's custom-crafted and stands apart from all other cars in styling, performance, value. These limos can come in a wide variety of setups, having the most flexibility in the ways they can be equipped for your wedding.

It can accommodate more people and larger wedding parties with the amenities to match. When you picture a limousine in your minds eye, it is very likely that you'll see a Stretch Limo. They simply exude class and luxury.

5. The Limo Party Bus

It may not provide you with that sleek wow factor, but it's functional and well equipped. The Limo Party Bus is different, and the difference lies in the purpose, which is transporting the entire wedding party. This is a great option as it has lots of room and even allows for standing space! It contains:

• Plenty of seats for everyone;
• Plenty of room for purses, coats, and champagne bottles; and
• A fun, casual atmosphere on board.

To be fair, you can't expect this car to be the epitome of class, nor should you expect to feel as though you've stepped into anything resembling a limo. This is definitely a functional vehicle. Your entire wedding party fits inside, and that spells good times for you.

6. Sports Utility Vehicle (SUV) Limousines: The Lincoln Navigator Stretch

The flashy SUV Limos. Lincoln Navigators stretched out, are able to accommodate more people and larger parties. It can seat up to 14 passengers. Celebrities and VIPs are the typical types of people you would see renting this limo. It has the perfect mix of luxury and style. The SUV Limo is one of the hottest wedding day vehicle in the segment. It comes with all of the standard amenities including a full bar, interior ceiling lighting, multiple televisions, and spacious seating. 

Most of you want to arrive at your wedding in style, and these days many options are available. You could use any of these limos to get you to the church and reception on time. As long as something can move you from here and there, it's fair game. Admittedly, some limos might seem more appealing than others. Make sure you select the right limo to accommodate your wedding needs.

To learn more about Echo Limousine visit them at  www.echolimousine.com or on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/echolimousine & Twitter https://www.twitter.com/EchoLimousine

Relationships Unplugged

Have you ever gone unplugged for a few hours or even a day or more? I mean really unplugged. No phones, no computers, no television. I do at least once a week for 24 hours and I can't tell you how significant it is in my relationships. If you've never unplugged, give it a whirl and let me know what you think.

Having a day off from emails, texting, social media, and media in general is extremely helpful in building and maintaining your relationships, be it with your spouse, children, relatives or friends. Think about how many times you've checked your phone when talking to your significant other or uploaded the latest pictures of your kids while they're vying for your attention. Or maybe the chatter of the television always seems to be the background music of your home. Turning off these distractions forces you to interact with those around you. And that's a good thing. In such a fast paced world, it's nice to have a regular breather. It's even better to have one when you can cultivate your relationships.

Consider that going unplugged means giving your undivided attention to your spouse when he's speaking. It means not being too busy to play with your children uninterrupted. It means enjoying true quiet time through meditation or self-reflection or reading a good book without having to put it down because the phone rings. These precious, but few moments, highlights what ought to be the most important areas in your life. And it's in these moments that your relationships grow, while you grow and learn as an individual.

Sure, it's hard. You're busy. You don't want to miss out on anything. But after you give it a try, you might come to realize that you didn't miss anything after all. You also might find yourself with a newfound energy and spirit. Hopefully, you and your loved ones will feel more connected and happier (if you all agree to being unplugged at the same time). If you're newly married, now is an opportune time to agree together to go unplugged routinely. Give yourself a day and time and stick to it. It will give you something to look forward to and more resolve to keep it going. 

Take Control of Your Wedding To-Do List in 5 Minutes

Tackling a long wedding to-do list can be overwhelming and stressful. That's why it might be a good idea to break it down into smaller parts and tackle it a little at a time. Not only will it get things done, it will help motivate you to keep crossing things off that list. And that makes for a happy bride! So what do you have to do? Wake up five minutes earlier every day and conquer one of these bridal tasks in five minute: 

1. Write a Thank You Note- You don't have to wait until you have a pile of gifts before you start writing your thank yous. Identify one person, grab a notecard, and write. Put it in a stamped envelope and you're done. It will save you time in the long run and your hand will thank you.

2. Pay a Bill- Behind on paying one of your wedding vendor invoices? It doesn't take much to pull out the checkbook and make the payment. In less than five minutes you can pay someone who's helping you and not have that worry looming over you.

3. Start Creating Your Guest List- Guest lists are the bane of many bride's to-do lists. That's why it may help to do it in phases. Get a blank sheet of paper and pen and set your timer for five minutes. Now start writing out names of everyone you think you'd invite to your wedding. No perfection needed here. Whether it takes you two or five days, you'll have a good list. Then you can tweak it as needed.

4.  Schedule an Appointment- Haven't yet scheduled that appointment with the florist or your hair and make-up trial? Open up your calendar and pick up the phone. Get it on the books and you're done. One less thing on your list! 

5. Write Out Your Playlist- Much like your guest list, you can break this one up in segments too. Paper, pen, timer and go! Remember five minutes is your max. Put your list somewhere safe and finish it in another five minutes on a different day.

Nothing here on your to-do list? No problem. You can break down pretty much anything that needs to get done on your end. Five or ten minutes makes it doable and less overwhelming. But notice how nothing on the list is done on the computer. That's because once you get on the computer, your tablet or other device you can get easily drawn away to other distractive things, like checking your email or updating your status. That's not what your five minutes is for. It's to get things done. Period. Now, Go!

Do's and Don'ts of Disagreements with Your Fiance or Spouse

When it comes to disagreeing with your significant other, take into account there is a good way and a less than ideal way to deal with it. Whether you're engaged, newlywed, or married for several years, there is an art form to communication. So if a disagreement or argument is brewing follow some of these do's and dont's:

Do Listen- Regardless of what your significant other is telling you, hear him out. Give him the time and respect to share his thoughts with you. Also make sure to actively listen. Don't just be figuring out how you're going to reply afterwards.

Don't Be Judgmental- Even if you disagree with your spouse, don't laugh his ideas off. If you think it's silly or even impossible, keep it to yourself. Your spouse is sharing his thoughts and feelings with you, so be considerate of that. Figure out what part of his ideas you can support and discuss that first.

Do Take a Breather- If an argument is looming and you simply can't keep it together, excuse yourself to think things over. Find a place where you can calm down. Good communication doesn't work if you're angry. Once you cool down and feel level headed enough to have a low key conversation, go back and share your thoughts.

Don't Forget Your Body Language- What your body does is sometimes more important than what you say. If you're rolling your eyes, crossing your arms, or otherwise indicating your disinterest or unhappiness, you are subtly telling your spouse you don't like what he's saying. Pay attention to your body language and make sure it matches your words.

Do Use "I" Statements- I can't stress enough how important it is to speak from an "I" perspective, as opposed to a "you" perspective. "I'm feeling like I'm being misunderstood" comes across more effectively than "You don't understand me." It stems from your feelings and doesn't come from a place of blame. So practice your "I" statements.  

Don't Get Yourself Down- Disagreements are part of every relationship. If this is your first one, it's okay. It doesn't mean your relationship isn't a good one. You both have different thoughts and ideas. The more you practice some of these communication skills the better you get at listening and expressing yourself. And that is a valuable tool for many years to come.

Are You a Clutter Free Bride? Take the Quiz.

Planning a wedding takes a lot of time, effort, and hard work. It also takes good organizational skills. If you're feeling disorganized, you might not be managing your time or workload effectively. You might also be adding more stress to your already busy life. Answer the following questions honestly to see if clutter is getting in your way:

1) Do you clean your living space regularly to a standard you're happy with?

2) Do you routinely throw out or give away stuff you know you don't need (e.g., junk mail, old clothes, etc.)?

3) Do you go through your mail and messages daily, responding or eliminating accordingly? This includes snail mail, email, and phone messages.

4) Would you describe yourself as neat and organized?

5) Is your wedding workspace organized and clutter free?

6) Do you feel calm and stress free when you are at home in your current surroundings?

7) Do you try not to worry about things you can't control?

8) Would you say you're usually calm and have peace of mind?  

Okay. So how did you do? If you answered in the affirmative for most of the questions, congratulations! You are most likely a clutter-free bride. You feel neat and organized, which gives you a better sense of control when it comes to planning your wedding. You're most likely on top of your wedding correspondence and moving right along with your to-do list. You also don't let negativity or feelings of guilt clutter your mind with unnecessary tension. This all spells for a confident and happy bride.

If you answered negatively for most of the questions, you might be feeling like a frazzled bride. Maybe your house is a mess, you can't seem to find important papers or remember vendor appointments. You're feeling overwhelmed because everything around you seems to be piling up with no end in sight. You don't like being at home because it reminds you of how behind you are with your to-do-list. You may also be feeling stressed out and anxious, continuously worrying about your wedding plans and maybe even life in general. If this is you, find someone to help you get organized and in control or hire a wedding planner to do it all for you. The key is to start de-cluttering your life somewhere. Remember: it's okay to ask for help!  

If your answers were mixed with both yes's and no's, then you might be feeling cluttered in some areas of your life and content in other. Being able to identify the areas you're not feeling as control in gives you the opportunity to focus on it and hopefully improve. Don't go through your inbox daily? Start by taking 5 minutes each morning to read, respond, and delete. You get it done and move on. Or maybe you're organized, but have trouble worrying about things you can't control. If that's you, start incorporating meditation or affirmations into your daily routine, to see if it helps with unnecessary anxiety. It's probably most common for brides to fit in this category. And that's great because you know exactly what you need to work on to be a clutter-free bride!

The #1 Mistake Recently Married Couples Make

So earlier this week, I wrote about the #1 mistake of recently engaged couples. You can read that blog post here. It only seems fitting then to write about the #1 mistake newlyweds make. Much like engaged couples who sometimes let the wedding planning process take over the excitement of the engagement, so to newly married couples might let the "formula" of marriage take over the relationship piece.

Consider this. Before marriage and possibly living together, your relationship revolved around getting to know each other, dating, and enjoying each other's company. Sure you had some heart-to-hearts and challenges that you faced along the way, but for the most part your courtship was exciting and fun. Now that you've tied the knot, however, you may be inclined to focus your attentions more on duty rather than relationship. Maybe it's, "Honey, do this, honey do that" or constant talk about finances or family. But the shift has definitely moved from relationship growth to relationship responsibilities. Don't get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with having a set of responsibilities. In fact, it's important for keeping an organized and well run home. And you certainly can learn more about yourself and your spouse when it comes to dealing with household matters. But being a newlywed, means you're at a critical time to grow as a couple, so you must continue to date.

Many newly married couples start to get the blues because they jump from being engaged to being married, when in fact, it would be more beneficial to go from engaged to engaging marriage. Don't stop being engaged with each other as individuals and only focus on the couple. Continue going out, having date nights, and enjoying each other's company. The last thing you want to do is begin your new life together with a rote set of marriage rules. It takes the fun, desire, and excitement out of your relationship together.

There is a time for everything: serious conversations, household chores, and even the occasional argument. But as a newlywed, let the love, laughter, and positivity reign supreme. It will help strengthen your relationship with each other and your marriage in the years ahead.  

The #1 Mistake Recently Engaged Couples Make

Congratulations! You just got engaged! The thrill and excitement is all around you until someone asks you that question: So when is the wedding? In the blink on an eye, your feelings can go from blissful to stressful. You begin thinking you better pick a date, reserve a venue, and start looking for the dress of your dreams. After all, your family and friends keep asking you questions and telling you to get started early with your planning. And so, you begin.

If this sounds like you, stop the wedding planning. Especially if you've been engaged for a couple weeks or less, now is NOT the time to start preparing for your big day. Now is your time to enjoy being engaged. One of the biggest mistakes newly engaged couples make, is rushing into wedding planning. Certainly there may be cases when it's warranted, if you're planning a very short engagement or your fiancé is in the military and heading overseas, for example. But if you're the average couple with no real limitations or unusual circumstances, then set aside some time to just enjoy being engaged.

It sounds simple enough, but your engagement is an event in and of itself. And while wedding planning happens during an engagement, it is not synonymous with being engaged. Your engagement marks your love for each other and newfound commitment to spend the rest of your lives together. Now that deserves a little attention. Instead of showing off your ring and diving head first into wedding talk, focus on your relationship together. Take a week or two to enjoy the moment! Go out, share your love and story with others, talk about being engaged and what it means, and have fun relishing in the excitement of saying "yes." Once you both have soaked it all in and feel ready to ask the detailed questions, take a deep breath and begin. Make sure you're both on the same page too.

Planning your wedding is going to take a lot of hours, which will fly by. Setting aside time to enjoy your engagement early on is a great way to safeguard this special moment. Let people know that you'll be in "engaged bliss" for a while and will inform them when you start the planning process. Hopefully that keeps the wedding questions at bay and your love in the driver's seat.

Love Letters

For the longest time, I've been wanting to write letters to my little girls. Even though they are too young to read, I wanted to pen my love and memories to them. Life can be short or long and take many unexpected turns along the way. What better gift to give to someone you love, then a written testament to it? This week I bought them each a journal and started writing.

With Valentine's Day upon you, now is a good time to think of all the people you love. Have you ever written them a letter to express your love? It's one thing to use the spoken word, and quite another to use the written. Writing something down always makes it feel more real to me. Plus, it's tangible. I may not be around 60 years from now, to hug my girls, but I hope that they will always be able to pull out their journal, read from it, and feel my spirit hug them. 

What better time to write out your feelings then now, as you journey into the next chapter of your life? It doesn't have to be a journal or even a long letter. But a "just because I love you" letter. You might have written your feelings in a thank you note, a birthday card, or the like, but it's not the same. Receiving an unexpected, out of the blue love letter will brighten anyone's day. So get out a pen and decide who you can write to today. Your fiancé? Mom? Dad? Sister? Brother? Grandma? Best friend? You get the idea. Try it once and see not only the response, but how it makes you feel. It will definitely strengthen your level of gratitude. 

This is also a great time to make sure you have your wedding vows written out, especially if you're writing your own. Don't just jot it on a piece of paper. Make a big deal about it- this is the person you're going to marry. These are the words you will live by and cherish. Frame it and put it somewhere visible after your wedding, so you can see it everyday. And if you receive any love letters from others, do the same. If you don't want to showcase your letters, buy a special binder to keep them it. Planning a wedding takes a lot of time and much of it feels like it whizzes by. Taking a break to write a love letter slows things down and helps remind you of all the important "who's" in your life.

3 Myths About Wedding Planning Stress

Ever wondered about your wedding planning stress? Maybe many of the brides you know seem to be doing just fine. So why aren't you? Why are you feeling overwhelmed instead of happy? Why is it feeling out of control? Is it normal? To answer some of these, let's debunk three common myths about stress.

1) Stress is Bad For You- Yes, you read that right. Not all stress is bad for you. Sure, if you find yourself surrounded by stressful events and situations a majority of the time, it's probably not healthy. But sometimes stress is actually good for you. Consider this example: An athlete trains daily to be at her peak performance level. Every day she stretches her muscles, exercises longer, pushes herself harder to reach her athletic goals. There is no doubt that she is creating stress on her body to reach her goals. Is it a bad thing? No. Without stressing her body and muscles, she would never be able to compete at the level she wants. Stress is good when it challenges you to work on yourself, improve yourself or your relationships. Stress is also a necessary component to help you get things done. If there wasn't some stress and urgency about planning a wedding, you might never get anything on your to-do list accomplished. You can use wedding planning stress to your advantage in that sense. So before you start pulling out your hair over all the stress you're under, step back and see where you can learn and grow, and act on it in a positive way.

2) Stress is Not Normal- There may be some critics out there, who say if you're feeling stressed while planning your wedding, you must be doing something wrong. I beg to differ. I'm sure there are brides who feel calm, confident and as relaxed as can be. But there are many others who feel quite the opposite and it doesn't mean there is something wrong with them. Stress is a normal part of life. It's all around you and it can come from unpleasant and pleasant situations equally. Your engagement is a happy time, but all the emotions and busyness around you creates an atmosphere ripe for some form of stress. Same holds true for other happy events like buying a new house or having a baby. It's wonderful and stressful at the same time and that's okay. Stress becomes a problem if it's keeping you from going about your usual activities or leaves you feeling down and depressed most of the time. Then you might want to get some professional help. Otherwise, stop labeling yourself and know that stressed or not, you're a normal bride!

3) Stress Can't Be Controlled- As normal as stress is in life, don't think there aren't ways to avoid it or deal with it better. Wedding planning might be making you feel overwhelmed and out of control, but that doesn't mean you have to let it keep you in that state of mind. Stress feeds off of your reactions to it. The more you let it get to you, the more it will. If you find ways to nip it in the bud, the less stressful your life starts to become. Ask yourself, what part of planning your wedding is making you feel overwhelmed? Now try to find ways to work it out instead of letting it fester. It might mean adjusting your budget, hiring someone to help, or simply choosing to be less reactive if something goes wrong. Making such changes will not only help reduce your stress, but will keep it from getting out of control. I should say, that this isn't always easy. Sometimes the "Woe is me" approach is easier, because you don't have to make changes or work at it. But you suffer in the long run. Try something and make the changes instead. See if it leaves you a happier bride.

Wedding Stress Getting You in a Bad Mood? Get Out of it with These 5 Tips

Whether you're still planning your wedding or newly married, chances are you'll experience a bad mood at one point or another. And it stinks. Nobody wants to feel lousy or have an awful day. But just because it happens doesn't mean you have to stay in a bad mood. Here are some tips for kicking your bad mood in the rear and getting your positive frame of mind back.

Exercise- One of the most effective ways to turn your frown upside down, is to work it out. Physical activity naturally releases endorphins in your body, helping you feel emotionally and psychologically better. So pick an activity you enjoy and just do it. Working out will help you get rid of the stress, that usually comes along with a bad mood too.

Do What You Love- Just like some things put you in a bad mood, the opposite is also true. What activity do you participate in that always makes you feel good? Cooking? Dancing? Pottery? Whatever it is, test it out. See if doing what you love helps you forget about your woes until you're feeling good enough to deal with it.

Tap Into Spiritual Healing- Regardless of your beliefs, there is always a way to connect with spirituality. Whether you pray, meditate, or commune with the nature around you, sometimes it helps to be able to release your worries and bad karma to a Higher Being. There is often a feeling of a weight being lifted when you learn to let go of your problems. Same holds true for your mood. Choose to let the bad mood float away, and replace it with a happier one.

Tickle Your Funny Bone- An easy way to put an end to a miserable mood, is to laugh it out. Watch a funny movie, go to a local stand up club, or get on the phone with someone who knows how to make you laugh. Even if it's just a short term distraction, it may be what you need to get out of your funk.

Do For Others- It's no secret that you feel good about yourself, when you help others. So if a bad mood is getting you down, do a good deed for someone else. Visit a sick neighbor, deliver food to the homeless, or participate in any other act of kindness. It's a great way to feel better and help someone else do the same in the process. 

3 Valentine's Day Gift Ideas that are Totally Free

The hardest part of Valentine's Day for a lot of couples is finding an awesome gift that says "I love you," but is unique, unexpected, and doesn't break the bank. Move over chocolates and flowers, here are three ideas that are totally free and would still make a lasting impression. Keep in mind, that you can always add a store bought gift option, but if you do it right, these ideas can stand on their own.

Express Your Love in Writing- Whether a love letter, poem, or other written expression, taking the time to pen your love for another person is a treasure your partner will hold onto forever. Outlining all the things you love about each other is not only a great keepsake, but also a gentle reminder of why you're marrying this person in the first place. It's a good way to keep you on track emotionally as you plan your wedding and through life's more challenging moments.

Express Your Love Through Your Artistry- Are you a painter, musician, dancer, or another creative spirit? If you are, consider creating something special with your talents for your fiancé. Giving a painting, song or other art form of the thing you love to the one you love says a lot. The thought and time that goes into a work of art will not go unnoticed. Plus, it's cool to share your gift with those around you. 

Express Your Love Through Action- Are you aware of the little things your partner does day in and day out or the tasks she dislikes doing? From grocery shopping and cooking to cleaning the house or doing yard work, give your partner a break. You can do this one in the form of a "week pass" or just surprise her one day. Do the shopping, cooking, cleaning or whatever else would make her day. Let her know how much you appreciate all the things she does and give her a break for the day or week, if so inclined. It's a nice way to give of yourself and show your appreciation at the same time.    

Choose the Perfect Venue for Your Wedding

Today, Stephanie from Canadian event planning website, EventSource, shares her insight on choosing your perfect wedding venue. Some great tips here if you're still looking around!

Congratulations, you're getting married! Now is the perfect time to start making plans. You never want to wait until the last minute. You'll soon realize that one of the most important aspects of planning the big event is choosing the perfect wedding venue.

Unfortunately, this task is typically not as easy as you might think. Why? There are a great many available options to choose from. The following information is meant to help you decide where to have your wedding. Once the decision is made, the rest of the planning process is much easier.

Choosing a Setting

The first step is to decide on a setting for the wedding. The location, atmosphere, and theme are big parts of the event. Knowing what sort of venue to look for, in the first place, makes it much easier to find suitable places.

Information for halls, churches, ballrooms, parks and all kinds of creative venues can be found on the Internet. If you’re planning on a church wedding be sure to look in to reception halls near the church. Find several that seem to fit with the theme and make a list, including contact information and notes on your first impression. That way, you can visit more than one and find a location that’s a perfect fit. Be sure to schedule a walk-through so that you can see the venue in person before making your decision.

Determining Spatial Needs

Are you having a large wedding with many people? Maybe you prefer a small gathering. It is important to keep in mind how many guests will be attending, when looking for a venue. Most venues have helpful information about their building capacity. Setting out tables and chairs to get an idea of what it will look like and to see how comfortably seated your guests will be is recommended.

The staff that you’ll be interacting with when choosing a venue are very accommodating and they want your experience to be the best, so don’t be shy about asking questions. If you’re feeling uneasy, having a little more space than what is needed might be the route you want to take in case of last minute changes.   

Visiting Venues

Before visiting the venues on your list, make a checklist of questions to ask at each one. No question is too big or small. These are a few examples:

• Does the venue offer wedding packages?
• Does the rental fee cover tables and chairs?
• Is catering provided?
• Will there be a coordinator or a crew to set-up?

Keeping this checklist with you as you visit each venue will make sure that you know everything you need to know about each one. If you take notes on each of these questions during your visit, it can help to compare them afterward.

The visit is also your chance to make sure the style of the venue suits you. Changing the whole interior style could be costly and time-consuming. If the style already matches the wedding decorations and attire, a few simple changes could lead to perfection. Also, be sure to check the venue’s policy on decorations, especially in the case of a traditional church wedding.

During your visit, be sure to look into any other aspects of the venue that will affect your decision. Make sure that there is enough parking, and that the accessibility needs of all of your guests can be met. If the wedding is planned for an outdoor area, ask about what will happen in case of bad weather.

Make sure that the venue’s tables, chairs, glassware and cutlery are to your liking. Check into the venue’s policy about noise, especially if you plan on live music or a DJ at the reception. There will be a lot to cover, but having your checklist with you will help you explore your options while having a good time.  

Narrowing Things Down

Take it easy and don’t overwhelm yourself. This is a special day and stress can affect the outcome. A pros and cons list of each venue will help you to choose the best venue that suits your needs. It is important that you are happy with every aspect of your venue.

• Is it affordable and within your budget?
• Is the location convenient for you and your guests?
• Is it what you envisioned your wedding to look like?
• Is there enough seating and space for you and your guests to feel comfortable?  

These are all questions you should ask yourself and your partner and be absolutely certain of before you make your final decision.

Remember, there's absolutely no reason to panic when choosing the perfect venue for your wedding. The most important thing is to take the time to actually enjoy the task at hand. Don't rush. Rushing only causes stress. Before you know it, all plans will be in place and you can look forward to the spectacular event.

Stephanie has spent years expanding her knowledge and passion in the photography, event and wedding industry. She now works for EventSource, a Canadian website that caters to all of your event planning needs. For more information connect with Eventsource on Facebook , Twitter , and Pinterest