Ever wondered about your wedding planning stress? Maybe many of the brides you know seem to be doing just fine. So why aren't you? Why are you feeling overwhelmed instead of happy? Why is it feeling out of control? Is it normal? To answer some of these, let's debunk three common myths about stress.
1) Stress is Bad For You- Yes, you read that right. Not all stress is bad for you. Sure, if you find yourself surrounded by stressful events and situations a majority of the time, it's probably not healthy. But sometimes stress is actually good for you. Consider this example: An athlete trains daily to be at her peak performance level. Every day she stretches her muscles, exercises longer, pushes herself harder to reach her athletic goals. There is no doubt that she is creating stress on her body to reach her goals. Is it a bad thing? No. Without stressing her body and muscles, she would never be able to compete at the level she wants. Stress is good when it challenges you to work on yourself, improve yourself or your relationships. Stress is also a necessary component to help you get things done. If there wasn't some stress and urgency about planning a wedding, you might never get anything on your to-do list accomplished. You can use wedding planning stress to your advantage in that sense. So before you start pulling out your hair over all the stress you're under, step back and see where you can learn and grow, and act on it in a positive way.
2) Stress is Not Normal- There may be some critics out there, who say if you're feeling stressed while planning your wedding, you must be doing something wrong. I beg to differ. I'm sure there are brides who feel calm, confident and as relaxed as can be. But there are many others who feel quite the opposite and it doesn't mean there is something wrong with them. Stress is a normal part of life. It's all around you and it can come from unpleasant and pleasant situations equally. Your engagement is a happy time, but all the emotions and busyness around you creates an atmosphere ripe for some form of stress. Same holds true for other happy events like buying a new house or having a baby. It's wonderful and stressful at the same time and that's okay. Stress becomes a problem if it's keeping you from going about your usual activities or leaves you feeling down and depressed most of the time. Then you might want to get some professional help. Otherwise, stop labeling yourself and know that stressed or not, you're a normal bride!
3) Stress Can't Be Controlled- As normal as stress is in life, don't think there aren't ways to avoid it or deal with it better. Wedding planning might be making you feel overwhelmed and out of control, but that doesn't mean you have to let it keep you in that state of mind. Stress feeds off of your reactions to it. The more you let it get to you, the more it will. If you find ways to nip it in the bud, the less stressful your life starts to become. Ask yourself, what part of planning your wedding is making you feel overwhelmed? Now try to find ways to work it out instead of letting it fester. It might mean adjusting your budget, hiring someone to help, or simply choosing to be less reactive if something goes wrong. Making such changes will not only help reduce your stress, but will keep it from getting out of control. I should say, that this isn't always easy. Sometimes the "Woe is me" approach is easier, because you don't have to make changes or work at it. But you suffer in the long run. Try something and make the changes instead. See if it leaves you a happier bride.
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