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Tuesday, March 25, 2014

It's All About the Bride...or is it?

Now that you're engaged you'll be hearing a lot about how the wedding is your special day and it's all about you as the bride. But is it really? Lately, I've been getting some questions about that attitude, as well as remarks that making the wedding all about the bride is quite selfish. Like most things in life, there is no simple response to such chatter.
Weddings are a wonderfully joyous occasion for everybody. The bride is generally the center of attention on the day itself and has been for decades. Everyone, groom included, can't wait to catch a glimpse of you, the bride. They want to see not only your beauty, but the radiance about you as you prepare to wed. And while it is your time to shine, the wedding day is always about the union of two people and the love you share and commit to for a lifetime.
So why the "it's all about you" talk? For starters, brides are usually the ones taking care of much of the wedding planning details. And since you are making many of the decisions, it tends to become about things you wish for at the wedding. Nowadays more grooms are helping with wedding preparations too, so it may become more evident that the day is about him too (which, of course, it always has been). A wedding is also a once in a lifetime event, so it makes sense that the day be about the happy couple, your wishes, and dreams.
What about the family, friends, and guests? Many of them have been waiting for your wedding day too. Don't they have some say as to how you celebrate? Here is where the disagreement might creep in. How much say others have in your wedding planning depends on your situation. Relationship, financial, geographic and other factors are important to weigh when making decisions. But keep in mind, that just because you have a unique vision for your wedding day, doesn't mean you are being selfish. How you express yourself, your attitudes and actions will reflect your character, hopefully in the best light. There are always ways to incorporate important traditions or requests of others, while keeping your wedding day vision alive. But always show respect, even when you disagree. In the end, you and your groom deserve to have a special day where your love will be celebrated, regardless of all the details.

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