Getting Started

Sometimes the hardest part of doing something new or tackling a project is getting started. You come up with a great idea or set your mind to completing a task and then something happens. You start to think about it, preoccupy yourself with tedious details, or simply begin procrastinating. Whether beginning the process of planning your wedding or pursuing another life goal, many people tend to over think instead of act. That's not to say, you don't have to put thought into your decisions. Of course, you need to have a foundation and a plan to accomplish any goal. But all to often, many individuals get so wrapped up in the plans that they find themselves putting off the "getting started" part until the right opportunity or time presents itself or until they are absolutely certain they have all the specifics worked out.

Unfortunately, there is usually never a "perfect" time and it's impossible to work out every detail, seeing that life changes from moment to moment and you never know what those changes will be. Better instead to have a workable plan and then take action. Once you start doing something, you build momentum and will find yourself accomplishing more. The little details generally work themselves out along the way. So if you're recently engaged and just don't know where to begin, the answer is anywhere. Start somewhere: the venue, bridal gown shops, or simply getting a wedding planning book to help guide you.  By taking the first step, you put yourself in control and will find it's much easier to get things done once you actually get started.

Have You Had a Date Lately?

It's the weekend. Have you had a date lately? I mean a real date with your fiance. One where you go out and enjoy each other's company and the time you are spending together. One free of worries, wedding planning, and for that matter, anything wedding related. Anytime is a great time to schedule one, so why not pencil it in for this weekend or the week ahead?

As the bride-to-be you are a busy woman. You have lots to do and there are times when you obviously have to discuss your wedding preparations with your groom. But as they say, there is a time for everything. That means, a time for a plain, old regular date-like the kind you had pre-engagement.  Having special moments where the two of you can focus on each other again, instead of all the busyness that comes with planning a wedding, is important. It helps your relationship continue to grow, gives you some down time, and re-energizes your emotional "batteries." Spending too many hours deciding what your centerpieces will look like or what your menu should include can get monotonous, if that seems to be all you're talking about since the proposal. If you don't schedule in some quality dates, one or both of you can begin feeling neglected or that the wedding is more important than the relationship.

Keep your priorities straight. You and your fiance are what this whole affair is about. To stay focused and maintain a good perspective on the importance of your relationship, schedule a "wedding free" date this week. Do something fun or romantic or both to keep your momentum going. From the beginning, decide that nothing wedding related is allowed during the date. Save that for another day. You can even create a "penalty" if either of you breaks the "no wedding stuff" policy. Maybe it's paying for the date, choosing the next date, or buying a token gift. Make it fun and lighthearted, without blame or anger. The point is to have an enjoyable day or evening, where you can concentrate on why you got engaged in the first place.